Dak Day!!

Maybe it's the spirit of the holiday season, a little bit of magic from that old silk hat, because today was a dak delight.

Today I was in Toronto to pick my daughter up from university (she couldn't possibly get all that laundry home on the Go Train). While waiting in the lobby of her Residence, I couldn't help but notice how the gentleman at the security desk, took a moment to acknowledge every single person walking by with a personal greeting. Sometimes the people he greeted would reciprocate, sometimes they completely ignored him, but regardless, he greeted the next person with the same respect and enthusiasm. I couldn't help myself. I walked over, offered him a pair of dakbands, and we started chatting. As it turns out, Lloyd attributes his positive attitude, to his 12 Step program. When I asked him how he felt when people ignored him, he answered, "It doesn't cost me anything to be polite and nice. I'm just grateful that I woke up today, and I'm here and alive and well." Amen Lloyd. Amen.

If that wasn't enough, I came home and discovered an awesome message from Shane on our facebook page. He shared about a friend of his who went above and beyond the average DAK. Brent Pilgram is a photographer from Milton, who got involved with an organization called Help Portrait. Help Portrait helps photographers donate their time, energy and skills to provide portraits to those who might not otherwise be able to afford them. An awesome idea. So, Brent, got involved with The Darling Home for Kids - a paediatric hospice care and respite services center in Ontario that supports families who have children with life-limiting or life-threatening illnesses requiring complex care and/or technology-dependent care. In fact he spent a whole day taking Christmas portraits with the children and their families. Please take a moment to read about the event (and see some behind-the-scenes photos) in his blog. We'll be sending Brent and his entire team some dakbands tomorrow.
(we'll ignore the reference to random acts of kindness in his blog :)

Shane, thanks for sharing about Brent. We'll send you some dakbands as well!!

Who Knew!

Tomorrow is World Kindness Day. Who knew? Not me, that's for sure.
At least I learned about it before, instead of after.

World Kindness Day was initiated by the World Kindness Movement, an organization I promptly applied to join on behalf of Deliberate Acts of Kindness. This is a description from their website:

The idea behind the World Kindness Movement (WKM) crystallised at a conference in Tokyo in 1997 when the Small Kindness Movement of Japan brought together like-minded kindness movements from around the world. The WKM was officially launched in Singapore on 18 November 2000 at the 3rd WKM Conference. The mission of the WKM is to inspire individuals towards greater kindness and to connect nations to create a kinder world.

If you have a moment check out some of the great events that are taking place around the world:

In the U.K......











In Singapore....

Now, what can dakbands do help celebrate World Kindness Day?
Anyone who leaves a comment, shares a dak, or makes a suggestion, here or on our facebook page, will receive a free set of dakbands - send me an email with your address after you post and together we'll celebrate World Kindness day.
eraakman@deliberateactsofkindness.com

Here is a kindness video to inspire us, from Humanity Healing International

Hospital Daks

The few of you that follow my little blog are probably thinking that my 'advent dak project', as I'm calling it, is taking on a similar on-again-off-again trajectory as my attempt to blog every day for a month. But you would be wrong. My failure to post about my dakband giveaways for the 9th and 10th, was not because I forgot, or didn't give any away, or was too busy....or any other regular excuse. I was in the hospital with a little heart scare :( But looking on the bright side, I had lots of opportunities to give dakbands to all the kind nurses and staff!!

To begin, I think it is important to say that our local hospital, Joseph Brant Memorial Hosipital, although facing staff shortages, funding challenges and a myriad of other difficulties, is filled with sincere, caring, hardworking individuals dedicated to serving the people that come through the doors.

Just a few stories that deserved daks:

Being in the trauma center (because my concern was heart related), there were some pretty sick individuals and stories taking place around me. All of them were moving. However, one woman who was very sick with complications due to chemotherapy, was being cared for by her 'best friend'(that was how she referred to herself). The patient could not talk because of a laryngectomy, so her friend translated for her, was asking doctors all the right questions, simply ensuring that her best friend was being cared for. She was there for hours!! She definitely deserved a dakband.

Yesterday an orderly was taking me down for tests. He could see that I was a bit nervous. So he very kindly gave me a mini lesson in meditation and relaxation. It was great. He was so gentle, and sincere. When he took me back to my room I gave him a pair of dakbands. His reaction was so touching. He told me that in Judaism daks would be called mitzvahs. I love that. I need to do a post about mitzvahs!! I saw him in the hallway as I was leaving and he had already given one of his bands away!

Post office kindness

Of course I am somewhat biased but I love the intentionality of kindness. Whenever I am consciously looking for opportunities to give the dakbands away, for the most part, I find kindness everywhere.

Today in the five minutes I carved out of a ridiculously busy day to make a run to the post office to mail dakband orders I found myself behind twenty people mailing christmas cards and packages. My first thought was to just come back at another time, but seeing as this was my only break in the day, and quite frankly when would be a better time between now and Christmas in terms of lines? So I settled in and turned on my dakband radar.....when it was finally my turn (now there were twenty people behind me!), I put all my packages on the counter (note the audible sighs). After the clerk measured and weighed them all and told me the cost, I realized that I had forgotten my wallet at home. I am already late to pick my daughter up from the Go station, and my son from daycare......what to do I wonder. I could feel the crowd behind me becoming mutinous....

This kind post office clerk, offered to keep my packages until I could come back with my purse. So off I went. When I returned an hour and half later, she had them ready and waiting. She definitely got a pair of bands. And when I explained that they were for acts of kindness, one was for her to keep and one for her to give away, she immediately turned around and gave it to her co-worker!

Panic

I'm sure this won't be the first or last time during this dak giveaway extravaganza, that all of a sudden I realize it is 5:00 pm, I'm going home to make dinner and unless there is a fire, won't be leaving my house for the rest of the evening - and I haven't given away any dakbands! And for some reason, the fact that it is dark exacerbates my panic because it feels like midnight. I begin to wonder if it counts if I just simply give someone a pair of dakbands, even if they haven't done anything kind? After all, it might inspire them to be kind. But then I wonder what to say, "Hi, I saw you just standing there in line and thought you might want some bands that will inspire you to be kind?" Doesn't really work does it?

So while all these scenarios are playing through my scattered brain, the cashier at Zarkey's is putting my dinner into plastic bags when I suddenly cry out, "Oh, I have my own bag thanks." There are at least five people behind me in line (groaning). But she not only unpacked my groceries, she re-packed them for me in my cloth bag. And she did it with a smile! I silently thanked the kindness gods and gave her two green dakbands!! She was almost as thrilled as I was.

Sportdaks

When I first conceived the dakband project (click here for story) I was responding to a need for a tool that could be used to promote sportsmanship and community within the youth sport context. My other business, Justplay collects data about the conduct of players, coaches and spectators (parents) in organized youth team sport environments. We analyze the data and present it back to administrators so they can identify variables that might contribute to problem behavior within their leagues and organization. As a result we've become 'experts' in some of problems facing youth sport organizations, especially those concerned with conduct and behavior. The dakbands were meant to be a solution to these problems, to encourage parents, players and coaches to focus on what De Coubertin (the father of the Modern Olympic Games) called "a nobility of spirit". Sportsmanship.

Although many parents and coaches insist that the positive character development that is associated with sportsmanship is a main factor for encouraging their children to participate in sport, few take the time required to teach it, emphasize it and highlight moments that capture it's essence. Research indicates that individuals (both youth and adults!) involved in sport do not by default learn to be good sports. Sportsmanship is a skill and it must be taught, emphasized and reinforced. We must learn as a culture to prize and reward, and recognize those moments that offer our children the opportunity to grow, not only as athletes, but compassionate, noble, generous human beings.

In honor of this effort we now have Sportdaks. Sportdaks are just that, dakbands that can be used by players, coaches and spectators to encourage and reward moments of sportsmanship, leadership, sacrifice, friendship and respect (both big and small) within the sport environment. Imagine being able to watch, as a team, as your dakbands travel from community to community encouraging people on and off the field!

We have prepared a tip sheet for coaches and parents to help implement the dakband concept into your games and practices.

If you share a story of sportsmanship in the comments I will send dakbands for your entire team! (random selection of a winning story)

Maryann

You might think that with a project like Deliberate Acts of Kindness I would know all the synonyms, adjectives and kindness clichés on the planet. And yet I am struggling. I want to give you the essence of Maryann so you can appreciate how kindness changes the way we live in the world.

One of wonderful emanations of the dakband project are the impromptu gifts of encouragement we receive from people we’ve never met. People who have received a dakband (or two), gone to the site to share their story and are so excited by the project that they email us their congratulations. For example, I was blown away when Heidi (Sacred and Profane) posted our button on her blog, and even blogged about the dakbands! Which led to Rhea (Texas Word Tangle), the SITS Girls (the SITS Girls), and Cheryl (Marching to a Different Drummer), sending us tidings of encouragement. Most of the time, it is a brief, uplifting, yet somewhat anonymous note, meaning the sendee isn’t really expecting a reply. However, the first note I received from Maryann - which was followed a few days later by a telephone call – was loud. But not an in-your-face-obnoxious loud, it was a big, round, yellow, warm, life-is-so-full-of-surprises loud. She basically said, “I want to meet you!”

Call me crazy, but I soon found myself driving down to have lunch with her and friend – Maryann has lots of friends. Well, you would have thought I discovered penicillin. Her vision and enthusiasm for the project was so HUGE. By end of the afternoon I kind of felt like I had discovered penicillin, and was about save humanity, so great was Maryann’s stroking of my reluctant ego. (However my family soon deflated my grandiose day dreams with their cries for dinner!) From that first meeting she has become a dak machine, purchasing bands, giving them to clients (she and her husband are financial planners), approaching retailers to sell them, contacting local papers, local schools, sitting for hours and selling them at fundraising events, and providing valuable feedback. She does all this at her own expense, with that same generous, beaming spirit that leapt off the page when I read her first email.

Please go to our track you dak page and pull up Financial Planning Etc. from the organization drop down list to see all the bands she has given away. Maryann has one band #30390 that has 4 stories attached to it!

If you know someone like Maryann please share your story as a comment and I will send you and your Maryann a set of bands!

….and when Maryann comes for dinner this Saturday we’ll read the stories together!

School Projects

When Kara and I began this project we each had a vision for specific aspects of community and how the dakband project could be adopted and influence different areas of our lives. Given our backgrounds it isn't surprising that Kara has a great understanding and passion for the corporate and special event world, with her advertising expertise. While I have a real devotion to the school and sport domains because of my history with Justplay. It has been amazing to work with people in all of these areas and to see the enthusiasm and support that the dakbands receive in such different environments. Although, I think it's important to mention that the great thing about dakbands is that they connect different social spheres.

So far for the month of November we have two very awesome school projects that involve the dakbands. One is an anti bullying project hosted by the Halton Catholic School Board called, 'Be the Change'. Kara and I will be working with groups of students throughout the day teaching them about the dakbands and the importance of deliberate acts of kindness. The other exciting news is that a local high school has purchased bands for all their students - WOW! We can't wait to see the ripples of change, and the stories from all these bands as they spread from the school, into homes and our community, and eventually around the world. We'll be inviting students and teachers from the school to write some posts for us, so stay tuned. Some time this week we should also have our first interview posted. It is with a teacher from Illinois, who bought bands for her entire class and has been so moved by the response of her students and their families that she emailed me to share her story. Now I want to share it with you.

Before I forget PLEASE go to our track your dak page and check out our new filters. Click on the orange 'Click for Advanced Selectors'. By choosing one of the selectors you can track bands by how far they've traveled, how many communities they've through and how many stories are attached to them - Can you say geography lesson all you school teachers out there!

Check out band #83494, and make sure you zoom the map almost all the way out so you can see where this band started and where it traveled to!

This week we are inviting you to tell us who we should send some dakbands to, on your behalf. And why. We'll feature the winning story/comments on a future blog, perhaps even do an interview. Contest will close at midnight Friday.

Welcome

Welcome to our daklife blog.

My partner Kara Hawke and I will be posting regularly about the Deliberate Acts of Kindness project: musings, observations, developments, contests, interviews, and from time to time perhaps even a rant or two! We hope you’ll visit often, become part of our global community, share your comments and acts of kindness that touch and change your life.

Our story

I created the dakband concept over the period of about year. (I’ll post a story about that creative process in the near future). Once I had some samples in hand, I invited a friend for lunch hoping that her reaction to the concept would give me the approval encouragement I needed to take the next steps. By the end of lunch (I’m not sure we even ordered any food!), Kara and I were partners. (We could probably write a bestseller called the Dak Diet)

As the V.P. of a boutique advertising firm, the mother of six, and an inherently kind soul, I knew Kara was the perfect partner. Her company (www.emersondesign.com) did all the fabulous design and logo work for the project. And within a few weeks Kara made our first custom sales (see Transitions Group and CBIC Run for the Cure). Her passion for the project combined with her networking skills continue to open doors that would make even Monty Hall jealous!

Although the project had a soft launch in the New Year, we are sending our ‘official media release’ out into the world next week. Emerson Group has created an awesome package that will go out to newspapers, magazines, organizations, and important individuals around the world so keep your eyes and ears open – or simply visit here to learn about all the latest developments and reactions to the project.

In honor of our official blog launch our first give away will be 3 sets of dakbands drawn at random from everyone who leaves a comment about an act of kindness that inspired them. The contest will close at midnight Friday the 24th.

I look forward to sharing with you all.
Yours kindly,